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A mother and son come back to StoryCorps for a final interview

MICHEL MARTIN, HOST:

Time now for StoryCorps. Today, a final interview between a mother and son. Jackie and Scott Miller first came to StoryCorps in 2008, and Jackie revealed a secret.

JACKIE MILLER: When I was 17, I got pregnant, and I gave this baby up for adoption and said at that time that I will adopt a child when I'm able to take care of a child.

SCOTT MILLER: Wow. I just wasn't ready for that.

J MILLER: I'm sure.

S MILLER: I worry that you'll never know how scary it is for me sometimes to imagine life without you.

J MILLER: That's something I can't make better for you. And I don't doubt it'll be tough. But you'll be OK.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

MARTIN: Jackie is now 88, and her health is declining. Realizing his mom could be nearing the end of her life, Scott wanted to record one more conversation.

S MILLER: I cannot believe 15 years have passed.

J MILLER: I don't have any more revelations to unleash on you.

(LAUGHTER)

J MILLER: And now I have an old person's voice. It cracks, but I still don't think of myself as old. I mean, when I find myself - oh, gosh - flirting, I realize a guy would have to be nuts to flirt back, but that doesn't keep me from doing it. The last time, a guy was giving me my flu shot, he was gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous. But my world is really getting smaller. Words don't come that easily to me now. It's really scary. The other day, I couldn't remember my cellphone number. I recognize this is part of getting not older, but old.

S MILLER: You know, in our first interview I had said it scares me, imagining life without you. And it doesn't so much scare me anymore. But it makes me uneasy imagining a world without you in it. You know, when your parents are both gone, you're kind of nobody's son. So when I think about what I'm going to be holding on to when you're gone, it feels so simple, but our conversations and your voice.

J MILLER: One of the things every parent wants to know is just, how happy are you with your life?

S MILLER: I'm very happy about my life.

J MILLER: I just would like to emphasize, and I want you to hear how you gave my life - give my life - such meaning.

S MILLER: I will miss having a friend who is unconditionally in love with you. There's no other relationship that's the same as that. You can have great friends or loved ones, but it's not the same.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC)

MARTIN: Jackie Miller with her son, Scott, for StoryCorps in Tarrytown, N.Y. Their interview will be archived at the Library of Congress. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

NPR transcripts are created on a rush deadline by an NPR contractor. This text may not be in its final form and may be updated or revised in the future. Accuracy and availability may vary. The authoritative record of NPR’s programming is the audio record.

Jo Corona